自从十年前失去父亲以后，无论怎样疏导，小女儿就是封口不谈这个话题，让我一直心生愧疚和担心。终于，并不喜欢写文章的她，在今年父亲的忌日，同时也是美国的国庆日，写下了她对父亲的纪念。我看了以后深为感动，不能自已，并为她终于迈过了心里这道坎而感到欣慰。我觉得文章写得很好，请了朋友一起把它翻译成中文，收集于此。
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“Ten Years”
Ten years. For the past ten years, the 4th of July has been a bittersweet day for me. A day to celebrate, yes, but for a different sort of celebration altogether.
Ten years. Ten years ago, I lost my father to lung cancer. It’s a subject I rarely ever speak about; there’s a good chance that many of even my close friends don’t know this fact about me. Yet, it’s a day I will never forget, a day that’s so ingrained in my identity that I wouldn’t be me otherwise. I struggled and hesitated to write this post, afraid I wouldn’t be able to do him justice, but it feels better to honor him than to let another year slip past with these bottled up feelings.
Ten years. I wasn’t even ten years old at the time. It’s striking to realize that I’ve spent over half of my life without him. Ten years of adventures that never got taken, of stories that never got told, of a life that never got shared. I sometimes wonder if I ever really knew him, and if he ever really knew me. I especially wonder if he’d be proud of me. You see, ten years is a long time to think. But sometimes, it’s hard to want to think at all, when the answers are never there.
I cherish the few memories I have of him, the even fewer I have from before he got sick. I wish I knew more about him. But I take comfort in knowing that he lives on, through my mother, my sister, through everyone who met him and knew him for the hard-working, selfless, and loving man that he was. I hope then, that he can live on through me, too.
It’s fitting that we celebrate his life on a day where we all celebrate the country that he loved. I will never know the true extent of the sacrifices and hardships that went into the early years of getting our family settled into this great country, but I know that it still affects me to this day, and for that I will be forever grateful.
Dad, I miss you so much, and I love you more than you will ever know. I’m all grown up now, but I will always be your little girl. I know that somewhere, you’re smiling down on me, and I want you to know that I’m smiling right back up at you.
(Dad & Me)
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《十年》(译文)
十年了。在过去的十年里，7月4日对我来说是一个苦乐参半的日子。当然这是该庆祝纪念的一天，但是不同的缘由搅在了一起。
十年了。十年前的这一天，我失去了父亲，他因肺癌去世了。十年来我极少谈及这个话题，即使我最亲近的朋友们都很可能不知道我的这些情况。然而，这是一个我永生难忘的日子，因为这一天在我成为今天的我之中起了决定性的作用 — 否则我就不会是我。我挣扎着，犹豫着来写下这些，怕我还无法对父亲有个正确的认识，但是我觉得我应该表达对他的怀念，而不是把这些感情封存在心中又过一年。
十年了。十年前的这一天我还不满十岁。我吃惊地意识到，在我已度过的生命里，竟然有超过一半的岁月缺失父亲。十年的活动未能一起经历，十年的故事不曾相互讲述，十年的人生无法彼此分享。我时而会想我是否真的认识过他，而他是否也真的知道过我。我尤其想知道的是，他是否会为我感到骄傲。你知道，十年的时间长得足够思考，但有时候当答案并不存在的时候，却是连想都没法去想。
我珍藏着对父亲有限的一点记忆，对他生病以前的记忆则更少。我多么希望我能更了解他。但从母亲和姐姐那里，从见过他认识他的许多人那里，我欣慰地感觉到，这个勤劳、无私、有爱心的人仿佛还活着，并未离去。我也由此希望能通过自己让更多的人来了解他。
在庆祝父亲所热爱的这个国家的独立日时，我们正好也来纪念他的一生。虽然我永远也无法真正体会，在那最初的岁月里，为了让我们一家能够在这个伟大的国家里安居下来，父亲所做出的许多牺牲和所经历的各种艰辛，但我知道，所有那些直到今天都仍然在影响着我，为此我永远心存感激。
爸爸，我很想念你 – 你不知道我是多么地爱你。我现在已经长大了，但永远都还是你的小女孩。我知道，在天上某个地方，你正对着我微笑。我想让你知道，我也正仰头对着你笑呢！